The pain of the loss of my beautiful, artistic, talented, kind, dedicated and sometimes annoying big sister is beyond anything I could have imagined. It can’t have been easy to be nearly five years old and to have a new sister in your life, but we were joined together by a special bond probably partly down to the fact that Mary never complained about anything! We had differences, of course, but the devotion of sisterhood remained throughout our lives.
We shared a bedroom for most of our growing up firstly in bunk beds - with Mary on the top and then in single beds. I remember many whispered conversations in the dark and listening to Radio Luxembourg under the covers. I always adored her - wanting to look like her, dress like her and behave like her - and always tagged along when she was with her friends probably much to her annoyance! We would sit in our bedroom, reading magazines (usually Cosmopolitan for Mary and Bunty for me), listening to music on the Dansette record player (Otis Reading, Chris Farlowe, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Motown, Percy Sledge) and, as part of growing up, smoking!!! We thought we were the height of sophistication but it didn’t last long as we didn’t really like it!
Mary took me on many adventures - to a nightclub in Banbury to see Julie Driscoll with Brian Auger and the Trinity play live, to the Locarno in Coventry to see the Small Faces and to Yugoslavia to meet up with folk singers and dancers she and her friend Annabelle had met in Germany the previous year. I did miss out on seeing the Beatles live in Coventry but Mary did see them much to my annoyance. When Mary moved to London to share a flat with her two friends Patsy and Sue, her then boyfriend and future husband, Vernon, used to take me down to London for weekends to see her. It felt very sophisticated going to London nearly every weekend!
Our Dad developed a progressive illness and died in 1970 and it must have been really hard for Mary to have been away from home during that time. Mary and Vernon married a couple of years later and I was their bridesmaid - I still have my dress and muff in the attic!
The girls, Jane and Hannah, arrived to much joy and they became the focus of Mary's life. She was a brilliant mother encouraging them to be strong, independent, kind and thoughtful individuals. Mary became a key member of TAMBA (Twins and Multiple Births Association) and was National Chairman for a period. I never knew how she managed to fit it all in, but somehow she did.
Then she discovered and developed her artistic talents with silk flower making and quilting. We are all proud owners of the most beautiful and colourful bed quilts, wall hangings, cushions, place mats and napkins and will always treasure them. Mary thoroughly enjoyed her involvement with a number of quilting groups, the exchange visits to Hoosum in Germany, the annual quilting retreats to west Wales and the visits she made to exhibitions around the country.
I'm really pleased that she made the move to Amersham to be closer to Jane, Tim and her adored grand-daughter Molly and that she was able to spend her last couple of years close by.
Mary always supported me during hard times and encouraged me to excel at what I did. She probably believed in me more than I believed in myself. I cannot believe that she is no longer with us and I miss her so much.
Elaine
